My wife and I don’t play sports together. Just not something we have any desire to do and my wife is ultra competitive and it is just best not to compete with one another. Not that we couldn’t have a fun time or that one of us wouldn’t end up mad but she wasn’t much of a sports girl earlier in life and so she isn’t much of one now (she has since enjoyed running). Why do I bring this up? Well, as I have been perusing the blogs, sports chatter, tabloids, and recent signings of decent players to lesser clubs I was immediately drawn to remembering a particular scene in a fantastic movie…

The movie? I love you, Man. The scene? Well, hopefully you know exactly which one… For those of you who haven’t seen it, there is a particular scene involving golf, the two lead characters (men), and two women… playing golf… the women not having much experience… at playing golf… At one point, Jason Segel (one of the lads), yells “THIS IS MY NIGHTMARE!!!!”

The gloriousness of that scene cannot be overstated. All men have experienced that feeling at one point or another. We can relate.

Right now, I am Jason Segel in that scene and this is my nightmare. Arsenal have yet to spend a single dollar. It is August. The season is only a couple weeks away and we have one addition to our ranks whilst sending many packing (granted, no problem with the lads we let go). This is my nightmare.

I am sick of hearing the rumors. Sicker still of the thought that we would blow $50+ mil on a guy like Suarez. He is not Arsenal material in my opinion. Can he play? Yes. Can he score? Yes. Could he make our team better? Probably. But will it come at a cost? Yep. Big one for me. While he may be “chomping” on the bit like a draft horse ready to ride he is not my idea of an Arsenal player. Too much drama, too many games to miss at the start the season, too many questions of mental instability. What the F are we thinking going after this guy? And why the hell has tater totts completed so many decent signings, spending $ that we should spend, compared to our zero?!?! (Sonago doesn’t count friends)

What team are we? Who have we become? What exactly is Wenger doing with this time these days?!?! I don’t want to sign for signing’s sake BUT this is getting ridiculous. Chelsea, Man City, totts… all figured out how to add to their team. What are we doing? Why do I keep having to type questions here instead of talking about our “singings” over the summer?

Fact is, I was truly looking forward to talking about additions and how they will slot in and dream up scenarios of where they would play… but this summer has been a big bust in the addition department. Granted, we need to cut some bait BUT we needed to add decent depth and a marquee signing or two in order to put everyone on notice that we are coming for the title (no, not the 4th place title).

But alas, no money spent. No real additions. No starters to add. Competition to enjoy. No shit to write about…

Just google “this is my nightmare!” and watch the clip… and think of better times when we bought players and won shinny things…

Cover of I Love You, Man [Blu-ray]